last night i slept at 00:00am. i woke up at 3:00am and randomly started doing situps. then i revised for an hour and went back to sleep.
weird much?
i had 2 dry pieces of bread and black tea. i used to shudder at the thought of having to drink black tea, but i'm used to it now. it feels good.
in school, i tried to revise every chance i got. i can't fail my exams, it is not even an option to fail.
i had a sandwich for lunc. it was disgusting, full of cheese and more cheese. maybe 2 pieces of tomato.
thats about it for my intake today.
however at the lunch time, i belived i was eating so i don't get questioned about my eating by my friends. they sometimes ask.
they didn't. i was stupid to eat it.
my new rule, is 'NEVER ACCEPT ANY FOOD FROM ANYONE UNLESS FORCED'. this makes you seem like you have so much control,you won't be called the fatty who accepts everything offered to her.
i need to stop making excuses. noone asked me to eat.noone cares
i am an attention seeker.
i've always wanted to lose weight just to get attention from my mum. i want her to say i am thin, or i have lost a little weight atleast. she has always put me down for my weight. she compares me to my size 0 sister constantly.
recently she's been bugging me about my eating. its weirdly satisfying. i feel so in control. i love the confused look on her face.
i just got home from school a few minutes ago, she offerd me pizza, i said no. she asked me why, i said just. i feel so powerful.
i should go, as i have english coursework to finish. meh!
anyone wanna write it for me?
haha. peace y'all ;)xx

Well done Hun. I wish I got up in the middle of the night to exercise and revise. lol...
ReplyDeletex
the same thing happened to me at lunch today too! i got a small cup of soup so my friends wouldn't ask questions, and they didn't. the soup wasn't necessary.
ReplyDeletei'm crazy jealous of your middle-of-the-night workout. i have no motivation to do anything at all if i'm tired.
<3Sam
I'll do your english if you do my french ;)
ReplyDeleteOoh, late night workouts, that sounds niiiicccceeee....that's really great though! You drink tea black now?????*shocked* I am so proud of you!
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel about eating food not to look weird. Happens to me all the time! Funny story: my dad and I went to this restaurant and I wasn't eating anything. I just sipped water. My dad ordered some stuff, but the waitress kept bringing an extra plate for everything and gave my dad dirty looks because he was eating and I wasn't! It was so funny, my dad was just like "I swear I'm not abusing her she just doesn't wanna eat!" Hahahaha :)
Good luck with your finals babe, don't let 'em drive you crazy!
Love you,
Scarlet<3
Its better than eating at weird hours of the night. Great inspiration and example, as always
ReplyDeletelove ya!
lol... yeah I love poetry too, just not the essays, which is what my french is: a 2000word essay comparing some poems. All in french. shoot me! hehe :) we shall survive the crazy work! Yes, we will!!!
ReplyDeleteHey jennie, Thanks for following. i still cant believe people want to read MY crap. Lol.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the tip too..
x
thanks for the comment hun and well done turning down that pizza. good motto - i always make unnecessary excuses to eat when nobody is actually forcing me. keep up with the good work and all the best with the revision. think thin. xoxxxxx
ReplyDeleteI love excercising at night. I can never do it in the mornings. Nights the time for it!
ReplyDeleteGood job turning down the pizza btw. :)
You are so thinspiring! I have mad issues turning down food. You can do it, girl!
ReplyDeleteI should adopt the motto 'never accept food unless forced'
ReplyDeleteit would do me a world of good.
also I'm glad I found your blog.